She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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