Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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