Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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