i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
