my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
