i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
