Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
