Rock
Scissors
Fuck
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
