she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
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