that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
