you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
