So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Vodka?
Forever.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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