I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
