We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize