six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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