It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
