I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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