pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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