I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
