I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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