ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
