Porn is love you can see.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
