YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
