its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
