How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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