In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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