Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
