i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Randomize
