My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
