Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
