Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm bleeding and have questions
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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