I wish I only lived at night.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize