so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
