was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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