I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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