i think my tv is drunk
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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