Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Sponge bath it is.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
