found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm always down for nudity.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
