Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
