dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
