I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
