she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
