can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
