haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
