I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I just had sex on a roof
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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