I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Randomize
