I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
