you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
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