She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
