What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
